Sometimes I forget. I admit it. It’s hard to admit but it’s true. But I admit it — I have been through the ringer. I have been through the ringer but people go through ringers all the time. I don’t want pity or sympathy — support and love and the occasional “way to go” will work. I’d forgotten. I’d forgotten in the attempt to pretend like I’m not always stuck in the proverbial ringer...

It felt as though we got home late today. It was, in all reality, about 5:45 but dark. I picked the boys up just a little bit late. Cooper seemed tired. He and Aiden have been fighting some version of a virus this week and I just think he’s a little tired from it all. We pulled in the driveway and I let Aiden down in the yard outside the car, knowing that he wouldn’t wander. I got Cooper out. He just seemed tired. He’s never...

Autumn, where did you come from? I’m home again and working on my Board work. I’m actually making a dent which is refreshing. I had a cup of coffee this morning with pumpkin spice creamer (completely unaware that it was the first day of Fall…..I hadn’t had my coffee yet). I sent the boys to daycare and preschool this morning, Aiden feeling a little under-the-weather but still joy filled as he is. I had to send them. I...

I don’t always “schedule” it like I should. You have to schedule it — grief that is. I can’t conjure my emotions or an emotional response, however, and so scheduling grief isn’t always easy and sometimes, well, it just comes. I’m at home working on my Board of Ordained Ministry work today (and not getting far). It’s a beautiful day outside and the boys are at preschool/daycare. It’s quiet....

This is what I have. This is why I can actually say, “Having kids wrecked my body.” And it hurts. It hurts in a lot of ways. It hurts when I look in the mirror and my “image issues” scream, “Oh my goodness! Are you 6 months pregnant?!” It hurts about midway through the day when I’ve been on my feet awhile and my stomach muscles start to feel the strain. It hurts when one of the children knees me...